16 October 2006

Booze Bus, A Thoughtful Consideration

Well now, that was a special trip. In retrospect, we could have gotten on the bus, driven around the beltway once and pulled into the closest bar. I wouldn't have really known the difference. Except the bars of Annapolis were filled with midshipmen and their fathers. Midshipmen are seriously not taking advantage of that whole gay-icon thing. I mean seriously- it saved Madonna from being just another Cindy Lauper (Cindy baby, we will always know that you were the one who really knew what girls wanted. Not materials, no ma'am. Fun.). It could do the same for midshipmen. When I mentioned this at work today, people agreed, and one person even presented her formula. Man + Uniform = 150% more hot.

Let's consider. If the average guy is a 5 out of 10, then adding a uniform will automatically make them a 7.5. Not a bad return on investment. But if a midshipmen with a uniform is already only equaling a five, then that uniform removed leaves a man that is decidedly less than average. Algebra giveth, and it taketh away. Yes, yes, they are learning to lead brave people into battle to fight for my right to titter electronically ad naseum, but really. It's simple math, boys. I digress.

The bus itself was run by these people , and over all I have to say it was pretty fun. The two guides who led us ("led" might be a strong word: "announced when it was time to get on and off the bus". Oh, and lest I forget, orchestrated the toilet paper races.) were really nice, but watching them be "party people" on the bus, I wondered what are they like at home? Do they discuss the pointlessness of existence and watch depressing Belgian movies ? Or are they as excited at home as they are on the bus? "WHOOHOOO!! Soap! It's soap in the bathroom! YEAH!" or "CARROTS! ROCK ON CARROTS!". I can't imagine. It must be exhausting.

The bus trip did make me realize one thing: there is a reason people in their late twenties don't normally do this. It hurts.

But if we didn't do it, then the terrorists would win. We all have to do our part.


Anonymous said...

Sorry I threw up all over myself on the way back. I saw you mocking me. It hurt.
But not as bad as the hurling.

The Princess said...

But did you WIN the toilet paper race?

Ar-Jew-Tino said...

Hell yeah, we won -- twice. Including the Southwest Airlines race, I'm now 3-0 in toilet paper racing. I'm so proud.

The King said...

I am totally the king of the toilet paper race, as well as the King of the Badgers. Only you Princess could hold a candle to us. You wouldn't let the terrorists win.

The Princess said...

I used to T.P. people's houses a lot in high school, so I'm very good with toilet paper races. You're right, I would NOT let the terrorists win.